Music To My Soul
by angiesvoice
Summary: A series of one shots of Jane and Maura's lives together and apart.
1. Fallin'

Please, put away the torches and pitchforks. I am super sorry for not updating Biting and Barking but I haven't had time to sit down and begin on the task of writing the next chapter. I know where I want the story to go but the words haven't come to me yet. School is being a bitch. I can assure you, June 1st, you will have my full attention for 3 full months. Please read and review these smaller stories that I've been popping out for the time being.

* * *

Dancing around her house, wiping the dust that'd collected in her long absence, Maura felt better than she had in months. Her energy was unexplained. She knew that if she tried to sit, the urge to move would be too much for her wired body. So, she cleaned, singing along to the music that poured from her stereo. Her chosen playlist was dramatic and filled with angsty songs, but she didn't care. She felt a familiar connection with the sad songs.

Searching for the Windex under the kitchen sink, she prepared to clean the inside windows of her home. The thin layer of grim refused to allow the waning sunlight in and that would not do.

It felt good to be home after spending 3 months in Africa. She refused to think about what forced her to leave the country for so long. Instead she focused on the people that she met and the lives that she saved. She saw Ian but their love affair had disappeared the last time he walked out of her life. They were no more than friends who used to have sex. At night, they would lie shoulder to shoulder and look at the stars. For the first 2 months, she imagined Jane looking at the same constellations, their souls connected across the world.

Jane.

The reason that she'd fled to Africa. The events of the warehouse replayed in her mind each night. But they were different. In her nightmares, her biological father turned his gun on Jane and fired, claiming the life of the dark haired detective. Waking up in a sweat, Maura could feel the remnants of Jane's blood on her hands. The washed her pale flesh raw, trying to forget the feeling of her best friend's life force on her body. Of course, those were not the events of that evening. Jane was not shot. Paddy Doyle was the one who took a bullet, as well Agent Dean.

Dean.

The thought of the wretched man made Maura cringe. She could not for the life of her understand what made her push Jane into his arms. Upon a later evaluation, she realized that he was in no way attractive. Under the suits that she'd often seen him in, was a disgustingly pale body, lacking all masculine qualities. How Jane had stomached sleeping with him, she would never know. While that is a harsh thing to say, she no longer had any sympathy for him. She learned from a friend in the F.B.I. that he was pronounced at the hospital. Maura felt no guilt for his death. He put himself in danger by break Jane's trust and showing up at the warehouse. Things would have gone so much differently had be chosen not to play hero fed.

But she could not change what happened. Nothing she could do would bring Dean back to life, not that she cared about him. She could not turn back time and stop Jane from raising her weapon to the Irish mob boss and pulling the trigger. She could not erase the pain that the Italian woman caused her.

Maura threw the used rags from cleaning the windows into the basket in the laundry room. Pulling the duster from its shelf, she paused her thoughts and listened to the song playing on her iPod.

_**I keep on fallin'**__**  
**__**In and out of love**__**  
**__**With you**___

___**Sometimes I love ya**__**  
**__**Sometimes you make me blue**__**  
**__**Sometimes I feel good**__**  
**__**At times I feel used**__**  
**__**Lovin' you darlin'**__**  
**__**Makes me so confused**__**  
**_

The meaning of the song struck her. Her first thought was Jane. Maura could not remember the exact moment where she fell in love with the dark haired woman but it was one night in Africa that she was willing to admit it out loud.

_"What has changed, Maura?" Ian asked her, the hurt of rejection playing across his face._

_ "I'm sorry, Ian, I just can't anymore. Being with you in the periods of time that you are around is not worth the pain of when you leave every time." She explained to him, walking away from him._

_ "Is there someone else?"_

_ "No…yes…no…I don't know. It's complicated."_

_ "Is it Jane?"She turned on her heel and looked at him with confusion._

_ "What makes you think its Jane?"_

_ "I saw how you were with her when I was in Boston. You seemed so happy around her. I've never seen you so joyful, even when we were together. I thought maybe you all were just really close, but when she walked into a room, you're eyes lit like a Christmas tree." She contemplated his response. Everything he said seemed accurate. Jane did make her happy. Her heart sped up whenever they were in the same room. It ached when they were more than an arm's reach apart. Ian looked at her sadly. "Are you going to tell me why you're here with me instead of there with her?"_

_ "I'd rather not go into details, but Jane did something that I don't know if I could forgive her for."_

_ "Is that why you're here?"_

_ "Yes."_

_ "Then, you're an idiot."_

_ "What?"_

_ "Maura, there is a woman in Boston who worships the ground you walk on. She would die for you. Anyone with a brain can see that. If you love her, you have to be willing to forgive her no matter what she has done."_

_**I keep on fallin'**__**  
**__**In and out of love with you**__**  
**__**I never loved someone**__**  
**__**The way that I love you**___

___**Oh, oh, I never felt this way**__**  
**__**How do you give me so much pleasure?**__**  
**__**And cause me so much pain**__**  
**__**Just when I think**__**  
**__**I've taken more than would a fool**__**  
**__**I start fallin' back in love with you  
**_

Maura was pulled from her thoughts as strong arms wrapped around her waist and pulled her close. She leaned into the familiar body and sighed.

"What's taking you so long?"

"You know I cannot rest peacefully if my home is not clean. I am almost done. Go upstairs."

"Not unless you come with me." She held on tighter as Maura tried to squirm away. Defeated, she turned around in the woman's arms and planted a solid kiss on her lips.

"Jane, I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

"I know, it's just…"

"I made a mistake. I was stupid. And I will spend the rest of my life apologizing if I have to." They stood together in silence.

_**I keep on fallin'**__**  
**__**In and out of love with you**__**  
**__**I never loved someone**__**  
**__**The way that I love you**___

___**I'm fallin'**__**  
**__**In and out of love with you**__**  
**__**I never loved someone**__**  
**__**The way that I love you**___

___**I'm fallin'**__**  
**__**In and out of love with you**__**  
**__**I never loved someone**__**  
**__**The way that I love you**_

"I didn't mean to kill him, Maur."

"I know you didn't, sweetie. I was wrong for blaming you. There were more factors that contributed to that night." Jane wiped stray tears on her cheeks.

"Don't cry. That's all in the past now. We have the future ahead of us."

"I love you, Jane."

"I love you too, Maur." She gently kissed her lover. "Now, let's go to bed."

"But, Jane-"

"No, buts. The only thing I want to see is your smokin' hot ass walking up those stairs."

"But-"

"March!" Maura scrunched her face and groaned."

"Fine, Ms. Bossy Pants."

"That's Detective Bossy Pants, to you."

* * *

If you don't hit that review button, Rick Santorum will pop out of your closet. (I considered having him doing something crazy when he pops out of your closet but Rick Santorum popping out of your closet should be enough.)


	2. Sexy and I Know It

So, as you all may be able to tell at the end of this chapter, this story is going to be a series of song fanfics of Jane and Maura's lives at various points. Some of them will be serious and some will be humorous. I will not ignore events of the show that do not please me. I may not approve of the outcome but I understand as a writer why certain things are necessary to the development of the characters. As much as I would enjoy watching Sasha Alexander and Angie Harmon make out on screen, a relationship as deep an complex as Jane and Maura's needs to be properly developed . I hope you enjoy these stories as much as I enjoy writing them. _

After a long day, Maura Isles walked into her home exhausted and in dire need to a warm bath. After being dropped a double homicide right before lunch, Maura spent the rest of her day performing autopsies and writing reports for Robbery/Homicide's investigation. The new detective in the division pushed her button one too many times during the afternoon. She turned down his advances, stating that she already had someone to go home to. The clock on her car told her that she was arriving home at nearly 9 o'clock. Her shoulders hung low, her body imbalanced and strained.

She threw her 6 inch heels by the front door, a habit she was quick to not take. Instead of hearing the calming silence of her home, she was overwhelmed by the sound of music coming from the kitchen. She sighed and hopped at it was not Angela. She did not have the energy to deal with the nagging woman tonight. She hung her coat by the door and went to inspect further.

_**When I walk on by, girls be looking like damn he fly**__**  
**__**I pimp to the beat, walking on the street in my new lafreak, yeah**__**  
**__**This is how I roll, animal print, pants outta control,**__**  
**__**It's Redfoo with the big afro**__**  
**__**And like Bruce Lee yeah I got the glow**_

_**Ah... Girl look at that body**__**  
**__**Ah... I work out**__**  
**__**Ah... Girl look at that body**__**  
**__**Ah... I work out**__****_

_**When I walk in the spot (yeah), this is what I see (ok)**__**  
**__**Everybody stops and they staring at me**__**  
**__**I got a passion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it, show it, show it, show it**__****_

_**I'm sexy and I know it**_

Standing out of sight in the doorway, she watched as her girlfriend, who she did not expect to see tonight, danced around the kitchen, fiddling with pots and pans on the hot stove. Under a pink flowered apron was the little black dress Angela insisted Jane buy so many years ago. The dress hugged the lanky woman's body like a glove. It brought the right attention her long legs and toned arms. Maura grinned at the thought of the first time Jane more that dress for her.

_Jane was beyond nervous as she drove to Maura's house that night. Had it been any other night, she would have been fine. But, tonight was different. Tonight, Jane was taking Maura out. On a date. Like, as a couple._

_ After several years of containing her attraction and love for the medical examiner, Jane finally found the courage to ask her best friend on a date. She was scared of rejection. She didn't want this to be like every man in her life. Her father abandoned her family. Casey always left. Dean betrayed her. With time, she overcame the hurt of each of these betrayals. Jane didn't think she could survive a rejection from the only person she ever truly loved. Maura meant everything to her. Not having the woman in her life would almost remove her reason for living. There were so many times where she could have died. She came close with Hoyt. She came closer with Bobby Marino. She should have died that day but the sound of Maura's voice telling her to stay gave her the courage to fight for her life. If Maura hadn't been in the hospital wing of the prison, she would have died at the hands of Charles Hoyt and his apprentice. Seeing the pain and fear in Maura's eyes, Jane found the strength to fight, to save Maura._

_ Jane walked gingerly up Maura's driveway. Her hands trembled, causing the single rose in her hand to shake. She self-consciously adjusted her dress. _

_ "It's now or never, Rizzoli." She told herself before knocking two times on the door. She shifted on her heels as she waited, impatient as a child waiting line for free ice cream. She stopped breathing as the door slowly opened._

_ Behind the door was a nervous Maura Isles. If you knew her, you know that Maura Isles was not one to get nervous for a date. With men, it was easy. They were already so taken by her charm and beauty that she didn't have to try very hard to impress them. They were hypnotized by her voluptuous bosom and her curvaceous body. _

_ But this was Jane. This was the strong detective who put her life at risk each day to make the world a safer place for those who lived in it. This was the woman who could send shivers down Maura's spine simply by saying her name. For years, Maura dreamed about admitting her feels but always found a reason not to. Jane was Catholic Italian. What were the chances she was interested in women? Jane's mother always set her up on dates with men. She turned them down, what made Maura different. When Jane came to her office one day and asked her out, Maura was speechless. Jane ran out of the room before Maura could say yes._

_ Now, they were going on their first date. Upon seeing the other, they were both utterly speechless. Jane, at Maura's stunning beauty. Maura, at Jane's runway model body._

_ "You look wonderful." Jane muttered, suddenly shy. This reminded her of her first date in Junior High. They were both so young and awkward that it never worked out._

_ "Thank you. You clean up very well, detective. That dress looks amazing on you." Maura blushed as she imagined what that dress would look like on her bedroom floor in the morning, as Jane did the same._

_ "Thank you." There was an unfilled silence between them. Maura chuckled._

_ "I think we should go, detective, because I'm 5 seconds from pulling you inside and having my way with you. If only you knew the things this dress does to me."_

_ "I think I have an idea."_

It was 4 years later and their relationship was stronger than ever. Even after several bumps, they always managed to find their way back to each other. Maura smiled as she watched Jane dance around the kitchen.

_**Check it out  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah  
Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle yeah, yeah  
Do the wiggle man  
I do the wiggle man  
Yeah  
I'm sexy and I know it**_

Ah... Girl look at that body  
Ah... I work out  
Ah... Girl look at that body  
Ah... I work out

Yeah I'm sexy and I know it!

Maura stepped into the kitchen, intending to stay unnoticed. She took a seat at the island while Jane's back was turned. She licked her lips as she once again imagined what that dress would look like on her bedroom floor, Jane's body writhing underneath her as she brought the woman closer and closer to orgasm.

"Why, my, my, my, you are sexy."

Surprised by the sudden company, Jane whirled and reached for the gun that was not on her hip. When she saw it was Maura, she let out a relieved sigh.

"Jesus, Maura, how many times have I told you not to sneak up on a cop?"

"I'm sorry, baby, I couldn't resist." She apologized innocently. She stood and walked over to Jane. "Baby, when did you start listening to LMFAO?"

"Wait, how do you even know who they are? I thought you only listened to classical music?"

"I still like to keep down with the trending music."

"Sweetie, it's keep up."

"You understood what I meant." Maura said, glaring up at her girlfriend. "As I was saying, you, my love, are looking very sexy tonight."

"I try."

"I know you do and that is why I plan to take full advantage of this dress."

"Meaning?"

"If I don't see that dress on the floor in 10 seconds, I'm going to send Korsack, Frankie, and Frost the video I just made of you dancing to 'Sexy and I Know It.'"

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, I would."

"You do and you won't be getting anything from me."

"Don't fool yourself, Jane Rizzoli. You couldn't hold out on me if you tried." Maura brought her finger to the curve of Jane's neck, caressing the skin there. She leaned up and replaced her finger with her tongue and smirked as Jane moaned at the contact. She sucked at Jane's pulse point as her other hand reached the bottom of Jane's dress, hiking it up to her hips. She pulled away all together and began to walk towards the bedroom. Jane leaned against the counter, panting from the simple encounter.

"But, Maura, I slaved over a hot stove."

Maura thought about this for a moment. Jane didn't cook often. When she did, it was amazing. But she had other plans tonight. She pulled at the side zipper of her dress and freed herself from the constricting fabric, leaving a dumbfounded Jane in her wake. Her eyes followed the perfected sway of Maura's ass in the black thong and matching lace bra. Maura yelped as she felt two strong wrap around her body and spin her around. Jane's tongue invaded her mouth as she masterfully removed her lover's bra. Her leaned down and took a rosy nipple in her mouth. Maura moaned, berating herself for putting herself in this position. No one teases Jane Rizzoli and gets away with it.

"Jane. Bed. Now."

"I guess we're having dessert first."

_ If you don't hit that review button, Rick Santorum will announce that the ending of his presidential campaign was just a joke. 


	3. You Haven't Seen the Last of Me, pt 1

_**Feeling broken**__**  
**__**Barely holding on**__**  
**__**But there's just something so strong**__**  
**__**Somewhere inside me**__**  
**__**And I am down but I'll get up again**__**  
**__**Don't count me out just yet**_

Jane sat on the worn couch of her living room nursing her third beer of the night. The cold liquid burned as it flowed down the back of her throat and managed to do the job of making all the pain she felt disappear. She wanted to forget everything about the last week. It all hurt too much. Worse than shooting herself to save her dying brother. Worse than watching Charles Hoyt nearly kill her best friend.

Ex- Best friend.

She assumed that was the truth. Maura made it pretty damn clear that she never wanted to see Jane again. But like a puppy that lost its owner, she came crawling back to the blonde haired doctor only to have her heart ripped from her chest and incinerated.

Walking into the bullpen just three days after the events of the warehouse was one of the hardest things she'd ever done. Everywhere she went, there were memories of her. She did not know what to expect when she walked in. Would she be there? After two days of unreturned calls, voicemails, and text messages, Jane finally gave up. As much as she wanted to go to the woman, she knew that would only lead to unproductive anger and possibly violence. Maura deserved time to heal and Jane would give her just that.

_ Preparing to step out of the elevator, Jane squared her shoulders and schooled her face. The detectives in that room did not need to know that Detective Sexy McBadass cried herself to sleep over the absence of her best friend, the Chief Medical Examiner. It took her years to earn the respect of her fellow officers and she didn't plan on losing it over their prying into her personal life. She stopped outside of the door when she heard the voices of her partners near the stale, week old coffee table._

_ "What does this 'sabbatical' even mean?" Korsack's gruff voice asked._

_ "In Dr. Isles' terms, it means temporarily taking leave from her position. In Jane's terms, it means she is running from her." Frost told the older man._

_ "That's just not right. Do you think she's even spoken to Jane since the warehouse? Does Jane even know that she's leaving?"_

_ "She's not leaving, for real, per se."_

_ "It sure seems like it. It's not right, Frost. After everything, she's just going to run like that. Jane doesn't deserve that. Not after everything she's done for Maura."_

_ "Dr. Isles is not like the rest of us. She's thoughtful and scientific She relies so much on logic that when something completely illogical happens, she explodes, so to speak. She cannot handle something not fitting into her perfect sphere. She's a scientist. She creates theories and experiments and draws conclusions. She does not know what to do when science cannot give her an answer. She cannot face her problems head on. She was raised to suppress her feelings because it is not acceptable to let people know how you are feeling. She needs to come to terms with what happened on her own time."_

_ "But to be mad at Jane?"_

_ "In her mind, Jane was acting like a cop, not her friend, when she shot Doyle. We all know it was a clean and fair shot, but she has so much happening in that big brain of hers that she doesn't realize that what Jane did was right. She does not realize that Jane cannot be Detective Rizzoli and her LLBFF Jane at the same time. Their entire relationship is a conflict of interests."_

_ "This whole thing is fucked up."_

_ "Trust me, I know."_

_The end of the conversation signaled the men's movement into the hall in which Jane had taken shelter. She quickly retreated into the vacant stairwell, praying that no one decided to burn calories today by taking them. Soon as the door shut, the uncontrollable sobs she'd held back since entering the building escaped her mouth. With each struggled breath, her chest burned with resistance. The salty tears streamed down her olive skinned face._

_ Maura was leaving. Because of her. Because she shot her father._

_The thought of possibly never seeing the blonde haired woman gave her chills. Goosebumps rose on her bare arms. She wasn't ready to verbally admit it, but Maura meant everything to her. Death was the preferable option to never seeing __**her **__smile again. To hear __**her**__ laugh. To watch __**her**__ goddess-like body in down dog position in yoga. The list was infinite. _

_**I've been brought down to my knees**__**  
**__**And I've been pushed way past the point of breaking**__**  
**__**But I can take it**__**  
**__**I'll be back**__**  
**__**Back on my feet**__**  
**__**This is far from over**__**  
**__**You haven't seen the last of me**_

_ Jane had to stop her from leaving. She couldn't let her leave on such bad terms._

_ The lanky woman pulled herself from the floor and wiped her face on the back of her hand. Once all evidence of her break down was gone, she raced down the stairs to her car and gunned the engine. She drove to Maura's house only to find it dark and void of human life. She had no idea where she was, so she went to the only person that would know._

_ Hospitals made Jane uncomfortable. She'd nearly died in them so many times that it felt like she was tempting fate simply by entering them. She asked the nurse in recovery for the room number, having to flash her badge to get the desired response._

_ When Jane entered the private room, Constance Isles's face told her that she was not surprised to see the detective. She set down the book she was reading and turned to the woman._

_ "Hello, Jane."_

_ "Hi, Mrs. Isles."_

_ "Dear, call me Constance."_

_ "Okay, Constance."_

_ "I know why you're here."_

_ "You do? Of course you do. You're Maura's mother."_

_ "I also know that you love my daughter deeply." Jane sank into a nearby chair, her face in her hands, trying to hid the tears that threatened to spill over. She let out a bitter chuckle as the old woman handed her the box of Kleenex from the bedside table._

_ "Is it that obvious?"_

_ "I'm afraid it is, dear. You've done a better job at taking care of Maura better than I ever did. You gave her the love and affection that she deserved and I couldn't give. I wish I could repay you for all you've given my daughter but the price is too great." The high society woman told her sincerely. Jane wiped her eyes with the soft tissue and bowed her head, mortified about what she'd done. Constance looked at Jane, surprised to see the detective who had the courage to stand up to her in Maura's honor, so broken and defeated. It did not take her long to figure out why. "And you think you've thrown it all away because you shot Patrick." _

_ "I did. Maura will never forgive me. I took away her only chance of knowing who her birth mother is. I killed her father. I can't even forgive myself and it would be disrespectful to Maura to even consider her forgiving me."_

_ "She will come around."_

_ "You didn't see her, Mrs. Isles. I've seen Maura angry and I've been on the wrong side of her fury, but this was different. The hatred in her eyes was so pure and honest. I think- I know she hates me. I hate myself."_

_ "Don't. Given what Maura told me, you did nothing wrong. Patrick brought his death upon himself. He shot a government agent. He couldn't expect you to allow him to walk away. Based on the circumstance, you did what was required of you as a law enforcement officer."_

_ "But I didn't do what was required of me as Maura's best friend."_

_ "Jane, dear, no one expects you to do both at the same time. It is not possible."_

_ "Maura sure made it clear that she wanted me to."_

_ "No, she didn't. Maura is hurting. Hurting because she might never meet her biological mother. Hurt because she almost died again. Hurt because she doesn't know how to handle her feelings towards you and what has happened. She needs time. There is so much going on in that big brain of hers. Science and emotion are two things that cannot co-exist for her, at least not right now. From a logical perspective, she knows that your returning fire was the right thing. Emotionally, she loves you and wants to hate you at the same time. Give her some time. She needs time to process everything. She will come back to you. I promise."_

_ "I hope you're right. I honestly don't know if I can live without her." Constance smiled at the young woman sadly._

_ "My dear, that is love."_


	4. You Haven't Seen the Last of Me, pt 2

_**They can say that**__**  
**__**I won't stay around**__**  
**__**But I'm gonna stand my ground**__**  
**__**You're not gonna stop me**__**  
**__**You don't know me**__**  
**__**You don't know who I am**__**  
**__**Don't count me out so fast**_

"Do you think we'll ever be the same?" Jane asked, looking at Constance, her eyes full of hope.

"Maura is a complicated human being but I think she will forgive you. What you all have is true. Nothing can ever come between true love." The older woman spoke wisely. Jane's expression was one of mourning, as if she expected this incident to have killed anything her and Maura could ever have. Constance's heart melted for the woman. The detective was such a compassionate and loving person and she did not deserve any of what was happening to her and she told her daughter just that.

_"You cannot be mad at Jane for doing her job." She attempted to rationalize with her pacing child. Twenty minutes ago, Maura came barreling into the hospital like a hurricane, her fury keeping the nurses from telling her that visiting hours were over long ago. She told her mother everything: about meeting Doyle and learning he was her father a year ago, to Collin, to everything that happened at the warehouse._

_ "The hell I can't. She was supposed to be my friend. Firing her weapon was the ultimate betrayal. She took my only chance at knowing who my birth mother is away from me with that bullet. Why should I forgive her?" Maura yelled, her voice overflowing with raw emotion. Her hands clenched and unclenched. She felt the urge to hit something, or someone, with all the force and strength her small body could muster. She wanted to hit Jane. She wanted the other woman to feel every bit of pain and turmoil she caused her. But Jane wasn't here._

_ "Because you love her."_

_ Her mother's words brought Maura to a grinding halt. "What?"_

_ "You heard what I said Maura. I don't need to repeat myself. You love Jane and it scares you."_

_ "Of course I love Jane. She is- was my best friend." _

_ "I think you know I mean a more than platonic love."_

_ "I don…meeeeeeeeep…." Maura started to talk but suddenly the words wouldn't come out. "I don…meeeeeeeeep… What the hell? What's happening?"_

_ "I think that is your body telling you to not bother trying to lying to me." Constance laughed at her daughter's expense._

_ "This is not funny, mother."_

_ "It shouldn't be, but it is, dear. Just admit it. Nothing bad will come of it. The sky will not fall. The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse are not coming to kill us all. The world will not end."_

_ "But my world just did. Jane is my world. Without her, I am nothing."_

_ "Now, was that so hard, dear?" Her mother asked sarcastically._

_ "Mother!"_

_ "Oh, Maura, calm down. This kind of behavior is not becoming. I am just trying to help you. You need to talk to Jane. Running away from this will only make it harder for your relationship."_

_ "There is no relationship. And there won't be for a long time."_

_ "Why is that?"_

_ "Because I'm leaving for Africa in four days."_

_ "This will not solve anything."_

_ "I can't be near her, mother. It is just too hard. There is so much I am feeling right now that I do not understand. You were right. I was scared to love her and I was right for it. I thought she would break my heart and she did just that."_

_ "So, you're choosing Doyle over Jane?"_

_ "I am choosing my father over the woman who shot him."_

_ "Maura, listen to yourself. Patrick Doyle is a criminal. He is at the top of the F.B.I.'s most wanted list. He has ended or given the thumbs up to end the lives of hundreds of people."_

_ "They were all criminals."_

_ "But they were still human beings. Killing them solved nothing. It only led to more killing. Their victims and their families will never receive the justice they deserve, the compensation for the death of their loved ones. Patrick Doyle had you kidnapped and held at gun point. You make think he loves you, but last time I check, that is not what love is. Love is everything that Jane has done to protect you and your secret."_

_ "Protect me? The reason any of this happened is because she told her F.B.I Fuck Buddy about my connection to Doyle. Dean shouldn't have been at the crime scene. He compromised everything. He shot Doyle first!" Constance allowed Maura's slip in proper language slide because she knew it only came out during life altering times of stress for the young woman, though she could not figure out, for the life of her, where she learned a phrase like 'fuck buddy.' Jane, probably. _

_ "And did you expect Jane to just let him go? As much as you think Agent Dean deserves what he got, that is not how the law works. Doyle had a gun. He was a threat to the safety of everyone in the room. He was a cold blooded killer who'd just added another kill to his list. For all you know, he could have been about to shoot her or her partner. In a situation like this, you have to eliminate the immediate threat. And Doyle was just that."_

_ "He was my father."_

_ "He was a sperm donor. William Isles is your father. He is the one that raised you to be the amazing woman that you are today. Do not let this new information about Doyle change that. And do not throw everything you have and could have with Jane because of him. She loves you more than life itself and I know you feel the same. I've seen you, Maura. You're face lights up when you talk about her. I've caught you daydreaming. The kind of daydreaming one has when they're completely and utterly in love with someone. Love like that does not happen often. Don't let it slip between the cracks." Maura listened to her mother's words. This Constance was different. She was more open about her emotions and how she felt. For a moment, Maura wished that this Constance had raised her. She would surely be a different person had she. Maybe the near death experienced opened more doors, like Jane's confronting her had months ago. Maura stood to leave._

_ "Good-bye, mother. I will let you know that I've arrived safely."_

_ "Good-bye, dear. I hope you find what you're looking for._

_ "Who said I was looking for something?"_

_ "You are. You just don't know what it is yet."_

**I've been brought down to my knees****  
****And I've been pushed way past the point of breaking****  
****But I can take it****  
****I'll be back****  
****Back on my feet****  
****This is far from over****  
****You haven't seen the last of me**

That was three days ago. She had not seen nor heard from her daughter since she stormed out of her hospital room. She assumed she was making preparations for her trip to Africa. God, Constance hoped she didn't run into Ian while there. She always hated the man. Maura expected too much from a man who could never love her the way she needed and deserved. In her heart, she knew Jane would do the job well.

"Do you know where she's going?" Jane asked quietly. She suspected that the older woman knew the details of Maura's sabbatical, but was not entirely willing to tell her. The thought of not seeing Maura for an unknown about of time pulled viciously at her heart strings. Knowing Maura, the distance being put between them would be great.

"She is going to Africa." The mention of the continent brought unpleasant memories to the surface. Her remembered seeing Maura crying and broken after Mr. Ian with Three-Hundred-Identities packed up and left. She wanted so much to take the doctor in her arms and tell her that everything would be alright. She regretted telling Maura that she'd take her to the airport if necessary. She didn't want Maura to leave. She wanted to lean down and capture the woman in a kiss that would convey all the love she had for her. She wanted to tell her that she would take care of and protect her with her last breath but she didn't. If Maura was going to Africa to reconnect with her lost lover, there was no chance in hell for her. Her love would remain a secret to the good doctor.

"To find Ian?" Jane asked hesitantly.

"To find herself."

"Oh," A silence filled the room but it was not an uncomfortable one. The two women seemed to find comfort in each other's presence. Maybe it was their connection to Maura that made them more open to interacting with each other. Maybe it was Jane's ferociously protective nature that put Constance at ease in her presence. "Do you know why?"

"Maura is very lost right now. Her love for you and her desire to know her biological mother are clouding her judgment." Constance told her.

"When is she leaving?" The older woman looked at her phone on the bedside table. She did not know if she should relay this information to Jane. The only reason she had it was because she called their family financial advisor and had her check on Maura's expenses. Once she knew what services she was using, she called around to find out when and where she was leaving. She did not know what the detective would do with the information but she trust Jane. Whatever she did would help save Maura, from herself.

"She is leaving from a small, private airport north of Boston. Her plane is scheduled to leave in three hours." With this news, Jane wiped her face, her tears long dry. She stood and tried to straighten the wrinkles from her suit, a habit she picked up from a certain doctor. "Where are you going?"

She looked at Constance with a sudden confidence.

"I'm going to get the woman I love."

If you don't review, Mitt Romney, AKA R. Money, will become president and we will blame you for the ending of all human life.


	5. You Haven't Seen the Last of Me, pt 3

_**There will be no fade out**__**  
**__**This is not the end**__**  
**__**I'm down now**__**  
**__**But I'll be standing tall again**__**  
**__**Times are hard but**__**  
**__**I was built tough**__**  
**__**I'm gonna show you all what I'm made of**_

When Jane left the hospital, she was determined. Her mind was set on finding Maura before she left for Africa. She would not leave without the blonde doctor. She would drag her back kicking and screaming if it was the last thing she did.

Not for a moment did she question her need to have Maura in her life. The woman had made such a strong impact on her life so long ago that without her there would be a gaping hole in Jane's life without her. It was not until Constance brought the subject up, did Jane realize why she was willing to go to such great lengths for the woman's daughter. She loved Maura. Jane Rizzoli was utterly and completely in love with Maura Isles. She had been for a long time but fear of rejection kept her from speaking the words that had long sat on her heart. With the possibility of seeing Maura, all the hope she'd lost slowly made its way back into her soul. Maybe if Maura knew how much she loved her, she wouldn't leave her. Maybe she would stay and they could work things out. All of these thoughts roared through Jane's mind as she raced down the interstate to north Boston.

But that was not the case. She caught Maura as she was getting ready to board the private jet and things did not go well.

_"Maura!" Jane yelled as she jumped out of her Crown Vic, not bothering to take the keys out of the ignition. The blonde haired woman whirled around at the sound of her voice. The sadness in her eyes quickly turned to fury at the sight of the tall detective._

_ "Go away, Jane!" She yelled over the howl of the plane's engines. She turned to walk up the stairs when she felt long fingers wrap around her wrist. She tried to pull away but Jane held strong. "Let go of me!"_

_ "I can't let you leave, Maura." Jane told her. Maura looked into her deep brown eyes with anger._

_ "You don't tell me what to do, Jane Rizzoli. Let me go before I call security." Maura warned, her voice low and threatening. Though Jane feared being on the wrong side her the medical examiner, she was persistent._

_ "Give me five minutes." Realizing the Italian woman would do anything short of flashing her badge and stopping her departure, Maura huffed and turned towards her._

_ "Talk quickly."_

_ "I'm sorry. I am so sorry, Maura. I never meant for any of this to happen. I was just trying to protect you."_

_ "You sure did a bang up job at that by killing my father." Maura sneered. She looked at Jane with a look of pure disgust and contempt._

_ "I thought I was protecting you. You were there. Doyle shot Dean and our suspect. I had no choice. I saw him raise his gun to me and Frost and I did what I had to do."_

_ "There is always a choice. You knew that he wouldn't shoot you or Barry. Why would he do that? You were not an apparent threat."_

_ "I am a cop. I saw a wanted criminal with a deadly weapon and a civilian in the room. What was I supposed to do? Let him walk away. This was not like all the other times. Two men had bullets in their chests because of him. He was not supposed to be there."_

_ "First of all, I would be dead if it were not for him. Kevin Flynn was ten seconds from putting a bullet through me and you wouldn't have been able to stop him. Secondly, Dean wasn't supposed to be there either."_

_ "I know he wasn't. His being there turned this whole thing into a cluster fuck."_

_ "He wouldn't have been there if it weren't for you. You told him my secret. You told him that my father was Paddy Doyle."_

_ "I didn't know he wouldn't follow me. I told him to wait until I have him the go."_

_ "You had no right to tell him. You knew because you were my best friend. Frost and Korsack knew because I trusted him. I didn't trust him."_

_ "It sure seemed like you did when pushed me into his arms each time he showed up."_

_ "Because I thought you could learn to trust him. But it turns out I was wrong, seeing that he betrayed your trust the first chance he got."_

_ "I didn't think he would!"_

_ "What? That didn't come to mind when you were fucking him while my mother's life hung in the balance? Answer me this, Jane: was he good? Did he make you come? Did you scream his name as he drove into you?" Jane was taken aback by the cruelness of the doctor's words. She'd never seen the woman to angry and broken. When Tommy was arrested, Maura defended herself like a civilized person would. She took all the anger and fury Jane threw at her and didn't say a word. Now, she was a totally different. She was using vulgar language that Jane never expected to slip through her perfect lips. Lips that seemed so soft by sight. Jane's eyes trailed to the soft clouds on her friend's face. Before she realized what she was going, she leaned in close to Maura's body. The other woman's eyes grew wide with shock before fluttering closed by instinct. When their lips touched, a jolt of warmth flowed through Jane's body. She tasted like honey, smooth and sweet. Jane wanted to bottle the taste and keep it for herself. For a few moments, Maura's lips moved in perfect sync with her own, giving and receiving pleasure. Before Jane's eager tongue could enter Maura's mouth, two small hands pushed her hard in the chest, making her lose her balance. She fell in her butt, too stunned to speak._

_**I've been brought down to my knees**__**  
**__**And I've been pushed way past the point of breaking**__**  
**__**But I can take it**__**  
**__**I'll be back**__**  
**__**Back on my feet**__**  
**__**This is far from over**__**  
**__**I am far from over**__**  
**__**You haven't seen the last of me**_

_ "You don't get to do this, Jane. You lost the right to when you pulled the trigger." Maura yelled at her._

_ "Don't you get it? I love you, Maura. I love you more than anything in the entire world. When I wake up and before I go to bed, you are my last thought. You are the most caring and intelligent and quirky person I've ever met. I love everything about you. I love that you know more facts than Wikipedia. I love that you dress like you're about to walk down a runway. You make me want to be a better person. Each time I go into the field, I make sure that I am being safe because I know how much it hurts you each time I get hurt. You make me eat fruits and salad and vegetables. Your light and beauty reaffirm my beliefs that not all humans are terrible. I've dreamed about kissing you for so long and now that I've had a taste of heaven, I refuse to go back." Jane poured all the emotion she held in for so long in her speech. She saw something in Maura twitch and she thought she's gotten through._

_ "Well, keep dreaming. It is going to take more than a few sweet words and a kiss to fix this. It may never be fix. You turned this into a huge cluster fuck of chaos. Don't you dare blame me for this. This is your fault. You ruined us, Jane. Because of you, I may never know who my mother is. Two men are dead because you couldn't get your shit together. I am so tired of all of this. I'm done, Jane." With that said, Maura boarded the plane, never turning to look back at the woman on the ground, hot, red tears streaming down her face. The doors to the plane slowly closed and the engines roared. It taxied to the runway and slowly began its course. She half expect the plane to stop and for Maura to come rushing out the door and into her arms, but she didn't. The plane took off without fail. Jane watched as it go, her heart being taken with it. For once in her life, she felt utterly and completely alone. _

_**No no  
I'm not going nowhere  
I'm staying right here  
Oh no  
You won't see me begging  
I'm not taking my bow  
Can't stop me  
It's not the end  
You haven't seen the last of me  
Oh no  
You haven't seen the last of me  
You haven't seen the last of me**_

**Thanks for reading, guys. I know these last three were more than one-shots but I felt like I could get a lot of emotion from this song. There are quite a few chapters to come. I have my fanfic playlist on repeat and I preparing the next few chapters. The next few are most likely going to be happy to combat all the angst. For those you reading Keeping Secrets, I will have an update by next week sometime.**

**Super shout outs to the reviewers who replied about liking Mitt Romney and Rick Santorum. News flash: I really don't like them. But I apologize if my 'mean spirited' comments offend you. Though, in retrospect, I am say whatever I want because it is my story. If you want to get into a political debate with me, feel free. Sorry if any of this sounds mean. I just take a lot of pride in being able to speak my thoughts because many people around the world cannot.**

**Finally, please review. The reviews help me know where to take each story. If you have a song to suggest, go for it! My music for this story remains within the realm of Soul and R&B and Jazz (I also suggest you listen to the songs before you read to enhance the experience), but if you have a song you think would make a great story, shoot me a review with the name and artist. If you do not review, a young fairy will not get its wings. Help a young fairy grow, ladies and gentlemen. **


	6. I Found A Girl

_**I thought I told you, [s]he'd be home soon**__**  
**__**Couldn't help myself, you're too good to be true.**__**  
**__**I fall short each time,**__**  
**__**Every time [s]he ain't here**__**  
**__**You and your charm creep closer**__**  
**__**Closer in here**__**  
**__**Like a fool for fire I fall, with my pride and all.**__**  
**__**Like a bomb before explosion,**__**  
**__**Ticking by your call,**__**  
**__**You're the wiser one, disguised from greed,**__**  
**__**And I'm just a child who belongs on her knees.**_

It was several months after the events of the warehouse. Following their reconciliation after Maura's four month absence, Jane and Maura decided to take a risk and pursue a relationship with one another. So far, things were great. There was no need for the awkward 'getting to know each other' period in a relationship for they'd been best friends for so long. Though, there was the uncomfortable 'you killed my father' period but that was as expected in the rebuilding of their relationship.

On Sunday afternoon, after a night of glorious love making, the new couple laid in each other's arms, relishing in the calmness of Boston. Jane's apartment was the perfect hideaway from Angela who still resided in the doctor's guest house. Maura's body lay entangled with Jane's, with no desire to move for the day, excluding the need to relieve herself and retrieve food. Feeling Jane's stomach growl under her, Maura left the bed, pulling on a black, silk robe she'd left at the apartment months ago, and ventured into the kitchen. While she rummaged through the fridge, there was a loud knock at the front door.

"Maura, who is it?" Jane called lazily from the back room.

"I don't know, dear, I haven't opened the door yet." She called back. She combed back her sex tussled hair back before undoing the bolt and pulling open the door. "Oh,"

In the door way was Agent Gabriel Dean, one of the last people Maura ever wanted to see. She was tempted to slam the door on this unattractive face.

"Dr. Isles, hi." He stammered awkwardly. He rubbed his hand against his bald spot and shifted his weight between his two feet.

"Agent Dean," She greeted curtly. "What can I do for you?"

"I'm here to see Jane. Is she around?"

"This is her apartment but I don't think she wants to see you." Maura told him, wanting him gone before Jane had the chance to see him. Maura knew personally how much his betrayal hurt the other woman and she would do anything to prevent that pain from happening again.

"I think that should be for her to decide." He said defiantly. He took a step into the apartment and looked around for his ex-lover.

"Baby, who is it?" Jane asked again from the room, her voice sounding worried.

"Jane, stay inside. I'm handling it." She said, stepping in front of Dean before he could advance further. "If you do not leave now, I cannot be held accountable for my actions, Agent Dean."

"I don't think you're in any position to be making threats, Dr. Isles."

"Actually, she is." Jane told him, suddenly appearing from the doorway, her eyes dark and threatening. Maura could feel the anger bubbling on the surface of her lover.

_**But I found a [girl] who I love more,**__**  
**__**Than I ever did you before,**__**  
**__**So stand beside the river I cried,**__**  
**__**And lay yourself down.**__**  
**__**Look how you want me now that I don't need you.**_

"Jane, I thought I told you to stay inside."

"Sorry, babe, my asshole senses were tingling and I had to see what's up. Clearly I was right." Jane sneered, pulling the sheet wrapped around her body closer, not comfortable with Dean seeing her in such a state. "What the fuck are you doing here, Dean? I thought I told you I didn't want to see your sorry ass ever again." He pushed past Maura and reached for Jane.

"I wanted to give you time to get over all that stuff so we can finally be together." He told her. She slapped his dirty hands away and took a step back.

"Sweet Jesus, are you that stupid? I don't want to be with you. I never want to see you again. Did I not make myself clear five months ago? Why can't you get that through your trick skull?"

_Five months ago, two months after the day at the airport, Jane sat in her apartment, alone, wallowing in her misery. Calls from her family were ignored. Her only solace was work. Putting away murdering bastards was enough to make Jane keep going. It made her happy to bring justice to a grieving family._

_ The last two months had been hard for everyone. Jane was agitated and everyone around her walked on egg shells. Her broken heart was taking its sweet time in healing from the rejection and absence of a certain blonde doctor. Jane's heart cried for the other woman who she could not have. She was not sure what hurt more: admitting her feelings and being rejected by the love of her life or not knowing if she was alive and safe where ever she was. No one had heard from Maura. Her parents worried. The weekly Skype calls between Jane and Constance Isles, who'd flown to Geneva with her husband as soon as the discharge papers were signed, made her feel close to her absent friend. Whether they realized it or not, the two women were very similar. Constance had trouble expressing emotions but under the high society upbringing was a woman who ate hamburgers and drank milkshakes. The Isles women lacked a similar sense of humor. After the end of each conversation, Constance tried to assure Jane that her daughter was safe but words could only do so much._

_ Jane stood from the couch to grab another when there was a knock at her door. She was reluctant to answer but with a second series of quick fire knock, she realized with persistent visitor was not going to leave. She prayed that it was not her mother, not in the mood for the Italian mother smothering, but what she got was such worse._

_**So, you thought that I'd crumble to my knees**__**  
**__**At the first sight of you crawling back to me**__**  
**__**To whisper "will you leave your [wo]man?"**__**  
**__**Cuz' you swear that this time you can stand by me.**__**  
**__**I won't stand by you.**_

_When she saw Gabriel Dean in her hall, she immediately moved to slam the door on his face but his foot found its way between the doorframe and the door._

_ "Move you foot, Dean, before I break it." She told him._

_ "Come on, Jane, just let me explain." He said, pushing against her weight on the door._

_ "You betrayed my trust. There is nothing to explain." She yelled back at him._

_ "I'm sorry."_

_ "Sorry isn't going to fucking cut it, Dean. You lied to me. You followed me. You made me lose the most important person in my life. You put your career before our relationship."_

_ "I know. I was wrong. But I hope you can forgive me so we can be together. I really do love you, Jane."_

_ "Too bad. Because I will never love you. Now leave." She rammed the door, crushing his foot. When he pulled back, she slammed the door shut and locked it._

_ "I understand, you need more time. I thought two months would be enough but I guess I was wrong."_

_ "That must be a surprise."_

_ "I'll be back, Jane. I won't leave without next time."_

_ "Come back and I'll have you arrested." When she received no response, she retrieved her beer and settled back on the couch, turning on the Patriots game. _

_**Cause I found a girl who I love more,**__**  
**__**Than I ever did you before,**__**  
**__**So stand beside the river I cried**__**  
**__**And lay yourself down.**__**  
**__**Look how you want me now that I don't need you!**_

When Dean took another step towards Jane, Maura stepped in front of him, a fierce, primal look in her eyes.

"I said leave, now!" She told him. She was furious at his appearance not only for her own sake but for Jane's as well. After having hurt the other woman so much, she pledged she would put herself between anyone who posed a threat to her.

"This is none of your concern, Dr. Isles." He told her, advancing. Jane shook her head at his stupidity.

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Dean." Jane warned. This side of Maura did not appear very often, but when it did, the woman was like a category 6 hurricane.

"The safety and well being of my girlfriend is my concern, thank you very much." The admission of their relationship shocked him. His shock quickly turned to confused anger.

"What? So, you're some kind of dyke now?" He spoke directly to Jane.

"One more word and you'll be in a wheel chair for the rest of your life, Agent Dean." Maura threatened, gearing herself for a fight. As much as she liked to avoid physical altercations, her nerves grew short. The few fighting moves Jane had taught her months ago would come in handy now, she realized.  
"Was it because of me?" He asked defensively.

"Yeah, it was your sorry excuse of a cock that turned me gay. Give it up, you never had a chance. We both know it was always Maura." Jane mocked him. His face turned red with anger.

"You're not a dyke. I fucked you. I know a dyke when I see one."

"And your gaydar didn't go off when you saw me? The fuck is wrong with you? Are you broken or something?" She sneered. But to be perfectly honest, she was the only female detective in the homicide division of the BPD. What were the chances that she was entirely straight?

"You're going to get bored of pussy and come back to me, I know it." He huffed indignantly. Jane rolled her eyes and laugh.

"Dean, it's not going to happen."

"You're going to miss dick."

"Trust me, she won't. We have one in the drawer in the bedroom as an acceptable replacement for your string bean sized dick." Jane snorted at the crude but hilarious response from her girlfriend. She tried to restrain her laughter.

_**I ain't yours for no taking,**__**  
**__**You must be mistaken**__**  
**__**I could never look into your eyes, and settle for wrong**__**  
**__**And ignore the right**_

"God, that was hilarious, Maur." Jane laughed, pulling the woman close to her body. She leaned down and planted a sloppy kiss on her cheek. Dean's sharp glare did nothing to dissolve the happiness of the couple. Maura smiled proudly and tilted her neck to give Jane a real kiss, tongue and all.

"I think you know where the door is, Agent Dean." She told him smugly. He took his leave with threats of returning but they fell on deaf ears. Jane dropped the sheet around her body and lifted Maura into her arms.

"You are the most amazing woman I have ever laid eyes on, Maura Isles."

"I know."

"And, modest, too? Now, how could I ever repay you for saving me, my knight in shining armor?"

"I can think of a few ways, fair maiden, one of which is located in the side table drawer of your room." Maura suggest coyly. Her eyes twinkled with amusement as Jane growled in anticipation. She carried her lover to the back room and gently laid her on the bed. She crawled onto of her already aroused body and began peppering kisses on her body, the silk robe long discarded on the journey back.

"I love you, Maura."

"I love you too, Jane."

_**Well I found a [girl] who loves me more,**__**  
**__**Than you ever did me before.**__**  
**__**So stand beside the river you cried**__**  
**__**And lay yourself down!**__**  
**__**Look how you want me now that I don't need you!**_


	7. Ain't No Sunshine

_****_Hey guys. So, I predict this plot lasting a few chapters. Some fluff, some soul searching. As always, follow me on tumblr: **thedarkestpassenger** and **morevintagebitches**

****For anyone who wants to know the names of the songs I've used, check the note at the end of this chapter.

* * *

_**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone**_

_**It's not warm when she's away.**__**  
**__**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone**__**  
**__**And she's always gone too long**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**_

_**Wonder this time where she's gone**__**  
**__**Wonder if she's gone to stay**__**  
**__**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone**__**  
**__**And this house just ain't no home**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**_

Almost a year into Jane and Maura's relationship, the happy couple's ship hit an iceberg. Jane was promoted to lieutenant and the job monopolized more of her time than ever. The increased workload kept her from family dinners and her girlfriend. The time spent apart created a rift between the two women. They knew it and everyone around them knew.

Maura was frustrated over the lack of time spent for Jane. She felt neglected and abandoned, in a way. The feeling in abandonment stirred up unpleasant memories from her upbringing. Her heart sank deeper each night that she ate alone and went to bed without the protective embrace over her lieutenant. Jane's Red Sox jersey and pillow no longer gave her the comfort she needed and deserved. Her nights continued to be restless and she woke up agitated and hypersensitive.

_**And I know, I know, I know, I know,**__**  
**__**I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,**__**  
**__**I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,**__**  
**__**I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,**__**  
**__**I know, I know, I know, I know, I know,**__**  
**__**I know, I know,**__**  
**__**Hey, I oughtta leave young thing alone**__**  
**__**But ain't no sunshine when she's gone**_

_She met her breaking point two days ago at a crime scene behind a building known for being a gang hang out. The victim was a young man, barely 19. Blood seeped through the bullet in his frontal lobe. Dr. Isles did not like to make assumptions, though, it was obvious that the cause of death was the gun shot, but it did not hurt to do a full autopsy before telling detectives what the COD was. When Jane strolled onto the crime scene in a wrinkled suit and sporting bags deep enough to hold three 10 lbs hams on Thanksgiving hanging under her eyes, Maura had no sympathy for her. She wanted nothing more than to be out of the presence of the woman before the rage that'd been brewing inside of her appeared. She tried her best to remain calm and level headed but the mere sight of Jane set her off it ways she never experienced. Without as so much of a greeting, Jane's beautifully constructed lips produced the words that pushed Maura to her limit._

_ "What is the cause of death?"_

_ "Good morning to you too, Jane," Maura replied curtly, not bothering to look up from the body. _

_ "Good morning, Maura. Now, what's cause of death?" Came the short reply._

_ "One would think that you would have learned after so many years." Maura replied coldly, snapping her blue gloves off and handing them to her assistant who peered at the women hesitantly. The red in Jane's eyes was enough to have her cowering away. "You will have cause of death after I perform a full autopsy, lieutenant." Without a single glance towards Jane, Maura stood and walked away. She felt the eyes of every officer and techie on her back as she walked._

_ "Don't walk away from me, Maura."_

_ "The autopsy will be performed at 10 AM, lieutenant." _

_ "Maura!" Jane raced after her girlfriend as a head of bouncy blonde curls turned the corner. She nearly fell forward as a thin wrist was yanked out of her grasp._

_ "Don't touch me."_

_ "What the hell is your problem?"_

_ "You're my problem. I am so tired of your behavior. You come home late, if you come home at all. You're short tempered and downright bitchy to anyone that comes within 10 feet of you. Everyone around you is walking on thin ice. No one wants to tell you to get your act together because they're too scared. Your own mother is afraid to cross you. I miss my girlfriend. I only see you in the morgue or at crime scenes. What we have right now is not a relationship. I am happy that you have this job. You deserve it after everything you've done but that does not mean you can neglect your personal life for it. I don't deserve to be put second. You are not married to this job."_

_ "Well, I'm not married to you either."_

_ "And for that, I am grateful."_

_**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone**__**  
**__**Only darkness every day.**__**  
**__**Ain't no sunshine when she's gone**__**  
**__**And this house just ain't no home**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**__**  
**__**Anytime she goes away.**_

Maura knew very well that it was a low blow. She turned away from the speechless detective and drove away in her car. The fury that bubbled within her kept the doctor from full understanding the significance of her statement. She cursed herself for not realizing the repercussions. Maura Isles was not brash and irrational. She did not say things she did not mean.

_Did she mean what she said?_

No, she didn't. She loved Jane more than anything in the world. She wanted nothing more than to be married to the sexy, gentle, and loving woman. She wanted the two car garage and white picket fence in the suburbs. She even wanted dozens of little dark haired Rizzoli children running around a yard. She missed Jane deeply. The Italian brought out something in Maura that she did not know existed. She brought out the good and the bad. She made Maura want to be a better person. Granted, people still called her 'Queen of the Dead' on the days where things between Jane were at their worst, but overall, she was an integral part of the family of police officers working towards a common goal at the BPD: to make Boston a safer place.

This rift between them would be put to an end tonight. Upon returning to the station, she made the difficult decision of delegating the autopsy to one of her more trustworthy assistants. After giving him explicit instructions and tips about working the homicide department, Maura left for the day, preparing an elaborate plan to get her girlfriend back as she drove to her home.

Using the white board in her office, often used by Jane to work on tough cases at home, she made a list of goals that needed to be accomplished. She would make Jane work to get her back. Their relationship could be repaired but it would take more than a sorry and a bag of fudge clusters. Maura soon realized that she could not accomplish the goals of this evening alone. She enlisted Detective Frost and Jane's brother who was on his way to making detective. It became their responsibility to have Jane dressed and at their first location by 7 PM that evening. It would be a challenge, but she trusted the two men to get the job done.

For this plan to work, it required her to make use of one of the dresses in the back of her closet that Jane had never scene. The garment was memory of a time long before the dark haired woman blew into her life. The dress still clung to her yoga built body in all the right places. Her generous bosom and toned legs were assets in wearing this particular dress. She knew that she would leave Jane speechless.

Her plan was as followed:

Frost and Frankie would escort Jane to a very low key salsa club that Maura had discovered during her time at BCU. They were to leave Jane under the impression that this meeting was a date. The women would drink and dance. Maura called ahead to her friend who now owned the club and reserved a table in the back and sent ahead a song request. The song was one she knew well and would be an acceptable prelude to the evening.

Then, they would talk two blocks to the Museum of Science where Maura pulled some strings and reserved the planetarium for the night. There would be a star lit meal, courtesy of Angela, waiting for them. There would be music, drinking, and reconnecting.

Next, they would take a stroll in the park. The romantic atmosphere would lead into her final step.

They would take Maura's car back to her house where dessert would be waiting, along with rose peddles leading up to a candle lit bedroom. Hopefully the well thought out evening would end with the couple finally reuniting as one.

Maura realized one thing as she drove to her hair appointment early that afternoon. The success of this plan depended on Jane doing her part and at this point in time, Maura did not know if that was going to happen. She wanted to repair this relationship but love was a two way street and it was not as hard as people made it seem to take a wrong turn. Maura loved Jane and the doctor would stop at nothing until she had her lover back in her arms.

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Songs:

Chapter I- Fallin' by Alicia Keys

Chapters II, III, IV- You Haven't Seen the Last of Me by Cher (from the movie Burlesque)

Chapter VI- I Found a Boy by Adele

Chapter VII- Ain't No Sunshine by various artist over the years, including Bill Withers, Marvin Gaye, and Maysa Leak.

**REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW**

****Every time you don't review, a ginger loses their soul. Gingers, don't take offense to this. I'm a ginger too. Sort of.


	8. Corazon Espinado

_****__**Hello all of my lovely readers. I know I promised an update right when school ended. I'm sorry. I suck. But, I worked hard on this one. As always, please review with good or bad comments or suggestions. Enjoy.**_

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_**Esa mujer me está matando.**_

(That woman is killing me.)._**  
**__**Me ha espinado el corazón.**_

(She's set thorns around my heart.)  
_**Por más que trato de olvidarla,**_

(The more I try to forget her,)_**  
**__**Mi alma no da razón.**_

(My soul doesn't reason)

Jane sat at the bar sipping an ice, cold beer. The bitter tasting drink did little to cool the anger bubbling deep inside of her. People mingled around the room, sitting at various places in the Salsa dive. The sound of maracas and guitars rang in her ears, pushing her growing migraine towards the front of her head. Young couples gyrated on the makeshift dance floor in front of the band. She groaned and adjusted the tie around her neck. If Maura didn't get here soon, she would leave.

_She wanted nothing more than to be at home, on the couch, watching the Sox game but her partner and brother cornered her before she could escape the hell of her job for the day. They followed her into the elevator, both carrying packages. Frost held a garment bag, which she later learned held a new, crisp black Gucci suit, tailored perfectly to extenuate the limited assets that her lanky frame possessed. Frankie had a box with a new pair of Louis Vuitton strapped heels and several other accessories. She eyed the packages with disdain and bit back the fury that sat on the tip of her tongue._

_ She knew the gifts were from Maura and wanted nothing to do with the blonde medical examiner. She was still pissed over the incident at the crime scene that morning. The bribes that her brother and partner held in their hands were unwelcomed. Taking a moment to calm herself, Jane searched for a Zen place, a relaxation technique that her girlfriend had taught her years before. Unfortunately, her Zen place was Maura. Before the rift in their relationship had formed, only the calming words of the super genius could stop the tornado that was an angry Jane Rizzoli. But, when that same sanctuary was the cause of the problem, Jane found herself lost and angrier._

_ "Take them back to her and tell her I don't want her bribes." Jane spat at them, turning away, focusing on the elevator door._

_ "She said you would say that." Frankie told her with a sad smile. He, like most of the people at BPD, was upset about the conflict between the two women. He knew his sister and he knew Maura pretty well too. He knew they loved each other. The number of times that they risked their lives for each other proved that. But they were both too hard-headed to realize it. When Maura called and asked him to help her get Jane back, he was more than happy to help. All her wanted was to see his big sister happy. After all life had given her, she deserved that much. For a while, he thought the Paddy Doyle thing ruined their relationship, but with time, they found each other again, their souls unable to stay apart for long. _

_ "Oh, she did, did she?"_

_ "Yes, she also told us that it would require a significant amount of force and coercion to get you into this outfit."Frost replied, stepping in front of the door, effectively blocked her from exiting as the doors opened. She glared and resisted the urge to push him out of her way._

_ "Move, Frost." She growled. The younger man flinched but held his ground. He would do this for the doc, even if it meant stepping to one of the scariest women he'd ever met. Unbeknownst to Jane, Maura was the scariest woman that he'd ever met. The doctor had a side to her that could give a grown man nightmares. Picking a side between the feuding women was like picking the worse of two evils._

_ "I can't let you go without putting this suit on, Jane."_

_ "You've both got 10 seconds to be out of my sight before I introduce my fists to your faces, understand. Ten,"_

_ "Don't forget the tie."Frankie chimed in._

_ "Nine,"_

_ "And the shoes"_

_ "Eight," _

_ "And the earrings," The doors began to close. Frost reached behind and hit the emergency break button. The car shook and stopped._

_ "Seven,"_

_ "And the watch,"_

_ "Six."_

_ "A night on the town awaits you, lieu."_

_ "Five,"_

_ "With a beautiful woman." Frankie told her, hoping to calm her anger before she did something she would regret._

_ Four,"_

_ "A fine woman,"_

_ "Three,"_

_ "Who loves you unconditionally,"_

_ "Two,"_

_ "Maura loves you, Jane."_

_ "DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT? I love her too, but it's so hard. How do I do my job as an officer of the law and my job as her girlfriend? It is not possible. When I don't do my job, people die. But I risk losing the most important thing in my life. You tell me how to juggle that!" She yelled, slamming her fist into the metal wall behind her. She brought her knuckles to her lips as pain radiated through her joints._

_ The two men looked at her sadly. They understood her struggle. Having a relationship and this job did not end well for anyone. While they were happy being bachelors, they secretly craved what the older woman had; companionship, true love. But, Jane had a point: it was their job to protect the city of Boston. Who would if they didn't, right?_

_**Mi corazón aplastado,**__**  
**_(My heart, depressed)

_**Dolido y abandonado.**_**  
**(Hurt and abandoned)

_**A ver, a ver, tú sabes...**__**  
**_(Let's see, let's see, you know...)

_**Dime mi amor,**__**  
**_(Tell me, my love,)

_**¿Cuánto amor**__**  
**_(How much love)

_**Y qué dolor nos quedó?**_

(And pain remains for us?)

Sometime between waiting and her second beer, Jane realized that she wasn't angry at Maura. She had no right to be. She was the one working late and shirking on her responsibilities as a girlfriend. She was just under so much pressure for everyone: her mother wanted grandkids, her brother wanted to be a detective, the mayor wanted the murder rate down. Everyone wanted something from her, expect Maura. The older woman just waited at home patiently for the return of her love, but even the most patient person could wait for so long.

Jane glanced at her watch again. It was nearing 7:00 and she had not seen nor heard from her supposed date. A crowd of people near the entrance to the club caught her attention. They swarmed like vultures around a mysterious person. The sea of people parted, revealing the most beautiful woman she'd ever seen in a black and red dress. To call it 'just a dress' would be an insult to the masterpiece that clung to the woman's lean body. A low V-neck cut dipped deep between two perfectly round and voluptuous breasts. The bottom of the dress was cut on an angle, beginning mid-thigh and traveling down past her knees. Jane's eyes stopped after longs legs at six inch heels. She traveled back up the curvaceous body to long, blonde curls combed to the right with a huge red rose clipped to the left. The color of the dress complimented pale skin and matched heart-shaped and very kissable lips.

Jane felt something stir inside of her that she hadn't felt for some time. Her palms were sweaty and her neck was hot. She was turned on. The woman who became the center of attention strolled up to her place at the bar with a feral look in eyes. A stranger wouldn't see the underlying sadness in her hazel eyes. It pained Jane to know that she was the cause of that sadness.

"Maura, I-"

"Don't apologize. There will be time for that later. Now, I just want to drink and dance with my beautiful girlfriend." Maura said softly. She laid a tender kiss on Jane's cheek before turning to the bartender and ordering a Sly Dog and two Flatline shots. The first drink was a mix of gin, vodka, and Orange Juice. The second was a possibly toxic shot made of Sambuca, tequila, and Tabasco. Unbeknownst to the world, Maura Isles could hold her liquor with the best of them. Jane eyed her suspiciously when she handed her the other shot.

"What's this?" Jane said, sniffing the shot. She scrunched up her nose as the Tabasco hit her senses. "Whoa, Maur."

"Be adventurous. Drink it." She threw back her shot. The burn on the back of her throat sated the anxiety that'd been building up since she stormed off the crime scene that morning and concocted this scheme to get her woman back. She hoped this evening would work out in her favor. She did not want to imagine a life without the tall, brunette in it. She watched in amazement as the detective took the drink from her hand and threw it back without a second thought. Her body shook and she squeezed her eyes shut.

"Hot damn," She whistled. Jane expected to be admonished for swearing, but looked down and saw nothing but love in Maura's eyes. She brought her hands to rest on her waist and pulled her lover close. She reached hazel eyes for any sign of hesitancy. When she found none, she leaned in for a tentative kiss. Warmth filled her chest and she felt at home. With no control to suppress the moan deep in her throat, Jane opened her mouth and granted Maura's feisty entrance. The clearing of a throat brought them from the pit of euphoria they so quickly fell into.

"Dr. Isles, your table is ready." The young man who spoke led them to a table excluded in the back of the club but with a great view of the band. Jane waited for Maura to slide into the booth before following her in. The young man set down Maura's Sly Dog and a fresh beer for Jane. Both women nodded and he left them in peace. Soon as he was out of earshot, Jane began to spew the speech that she'd come up with just moments before Maura had walked into the club.

"Maura, I am so sorry. I feel terrible. I haven't been home. I've been bitchy and rude and unprofessional. I have been the worst girlfriend in the entire existence of the world. I had this while speech thought out about how I was going to apologize and make it up to you but that seems to have gone out the window as soon as you walked in. God damn, you're so beautiful. You take my breath away. All I want to do is kiss and make love to you. You have the body of a goddess and the soul of an angel. I've got so much darkness inside of me and I will never understand why fate would put us together, but I'm glad it did. You are the most amazing person I have ever met. You are so intelligent and caring and gorgeous. I love everything about you. Your facts are adorable. The face you make when you're thinking is unbelievably cute. I love that you have a turtle and that you feed him fancy strawberries and talk to him. I owe you my life so many times over. You saved me from my own demons and you've made me a better person. I love you so much. I don't think I would survive you hating me again. It hurts to imagine my life without you in it. I will do anything to make this right. Even if it means giving up my job. You mean too much to me. I love you, Maura Isles, more than anything in the world. Can you forgive me?"

When Maura remained silent, Jane grew worried. The blonde just stared at her and suddenly reached for a scarred hand across the table. She pulled Jane to her feet and onto the dance floor. A new song began and she pulled Jane's body close to hers.

"Just follow my lead, love." She whispered in her lover's ear. Jane immediately looked down at her two left feet in high heels. She foresaw this ending badly but it was what Maura wanted. Towards the chorus, she found her footing and began to move fluidly with her partner. Their bodies twisted and swayed in sync. Holding Maura close to her, Jane knew they were meant for each other. The way Maura's body fit perfectly with her own was no coincidence.

_**Ah, ah, ah, corazón espinado.**__  
_(Ah, ah, ah, thorned heart.)

_**Ah, ah, ah, cómo me duele el amor.**_**  
**(Ah, ah, ah, how love hurts me.)

_**Cómo duele, cómo duele el corazón**_

_(How it hurts, how the heart hurts)_

_**Cuando nos tiene entregados**_

_( __When it has us belonging to another)_

_**Pero no olvides mujer que algún día dirás,**_

_(But don't forget, woman, that one day you'll say,)_

_**"Ay, ay, ay, cómo me duele el amor."**_

_("Ay, ay, ay, how love hurts me.")_

Without any warning, Maura turned around and swayed her hips to the beats of the music against Jane's body. So taken aback by the action, Jane stood frozen, and unsure what to do. She took her best guess and brought her hands to Maura's hips and continued to dance. Figuring she was correction in her decision when Maura placed her hands on top of hers, she took Maura's hands and lifted them above their heads and sashayed their joined bodies to the floor. Unaware that all eyes in the room were on them, they melted into each other, the pain of the last few months fading into the back of their minds as they reconnected.

_**Cómo me duele el olvido,**_

_(How it hurts to forget)_

_**Cómo duele el corazón,**_

_(How the heart hurts,)_

_**Cómo me duele estar vivo**_

_(How it hurts being alive)_

_**Sin tenerte a un lado, amor.**_

_(Without you beside me, my love.)_

**Corazón espinado...**

(Thorned heart...)

The song slowly ended and captured them from their bliss. Maura turned around and placed a soft kiss on Jane's lips.

"I missed you." She whispered, leaning their foreheads together.

"I missed you, too."

"Jane,"

"Yes, love?"

"Its tortoise."

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**Before you leave this page, please REVIEW REVIEW REVIEW. They really help me decided where to do with this story. Review with an answer to the following questions:**

**Do you want Dean to reappear? If he does, what do you want to happen?**

**Do you want me to finish with this making-up story line that I've had for the last two chapters? Would you like to stop here or do you want the whole nine yards of Jane and Maura's night of painting the town red(or maybe RAINBOW)?**

**As always, follow me on tumblr. My new name is killerbunniesattack. I may make a separate account for my fandoms and fics if I get enough people who would like one. Let me know!**

**TTFN**


	9. So In Love

**Hi everyone. So, this is just a quick one shot I wrote for tumblr. It is not the next installment to the previous chapter about Jane and Maura fighting. That story is in progress but my muse has been on summer vacation. I am making progress on that story. I promise to finish it soon. Until then, there will be short ficlets like this on in between. Enjoy.**

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_**Yeah, yeah, yeah!**__**  
**__**I'm glad this week is over,**__**  
**__**I need to get away,**__**  
**__**Go home and throw my clothes on,**__**  
**__**Come get you right away!**__**  
**__**Can't wait to see you looking lovely,**__**  
**__**I hope you're thinking of me,**__**  
**__**Cause all I want is time with you**__**  
**__**And don't need nothing more!**_

Jane pulled her car to a stop in front of the hotel. She looked out the window and grimaced. God, she hated these kinds of events. Being Boston's Hero was never fun, but the annual police ball topped her list of worst things ever. It required her to wear her dress uniform and it made her look like a man. The hat on her head was uncomfortable. The tie around her neck was constricting. The shoes on her feet made her look like a clown. But Cavanaugh was adamant about her being there. Something about her presence helping to get more donations to their department which was suffering budget cuts at the moment.

She agreed, for the sake of not pissing her boss off. She knew Frost, Korsack, and Frankie were going. The four of them together made for a good night, especially with an open bar. If she stayed with them the entire night, the numerous male suitors that tended to flock to her would keep their distance. But the worst came two hours before. Her face fell as she listened to the voicemail from her girlfriend, telling her that she would be late to the gala, because a body came in during the afternoon and the autopsy could not wait till morning. She would have to walk alone into a room full of testosterone filled men competing for her attention in hopes for getting her into their beds. Grr.

_**I see you cross the room,**__**  
**__**Talking with some men,**__**  
**__**I love your mannerisms, babe,**__**  
**__**The way you handle them**__**  
**__**Oh, I'm so proud to be with you**__**  
**__**So attracted to you too,**__**  
**__**You're so damn good to me,**__**  
**__**In everything you do**_

She handed her keys of the valet and made her way into the building. The door was opened to her with a courteous head nod. Music and voice filled her ears as she walked down the hall to the ballroom. Various members of BPD lingered in the hall, but inside were the true reasons for tonight's event. Several big names in Boston painted the walls of the room, mingling with each other about god knows what. She quickly spotted the mayor was near the bar, talking to an unknown woman.

The face belonging to a full heard of blonde hair was blocked by the mayor's burly body. But, Jane was able to sneak a peek at long, toned legs. She looked closer at the legs and realized something seem familiar about them. She knew those legs. She'd caressed those legs. Her head was between those legs earlier that morning.

_I thought Maua wasn't coming until later_, Jane thought. She looked at her watch and realized it was later. Jane Rizzoli was never one to be punctual.

She watched as Boston's married mayor leaned into her girlfriend and planted his hand on her forearm. The simple gesture set her off. Maura looked down into her drink, clearly not comfortable with the contact. The man was known for his affairs but the Chief Medical Examiner. Really?

Before Jane had a chance to assert her position in Maura's life, the doctor politely moved the mayor's and ended the conversation. He reached for her again and she slapped his hand away as politely as possible. He was the mayor of Boson, after all.

_**Listen, I'm so in love with you,**__**  
**__**That I can't help myself!**__**  
**__**Can't help it!**__**  
**__**As long as it's me and you**__**  
**__**We don't need nothing else!**__**  
**__**I've got you!**__**  
**__**Got you!**__**  
**__**Hey, hey, hey, yeah, yeah,**__**  
**__**Oh, Let's make it last forever!**_

"As I said, sir, I am in a committed relationship." She told him firmly.

"I bet I can show you a better time than your boyfriend can." He slurred, his intoxication obvious.

"I don't have a boyfriend, sir. I am in a relationship with a woman." When he looked at her with a look of pure confusion, she elaborated. "I'm gay. I like women. I am in love with a woman." Unfortunately, this did not deter him. Having seen enough, Jane walked next to Maura and threw her arms around the smaller woman's waist.

"Good evening sir, Detective Jane Rizzoli, homicide." He made eye contact with the taller woman; the icy look in her eyes caused him to flinch away from her. "I see you've met my girlfriend. Isn't she brilliant?" He looked at Maura and then at Jane. He quickly murmured his excuses and fled the scene, his tail between his legs.

_**So in love with you,**__**  
**__**So in love with you,**__**  
**__**Any obstacle that come my way,**__**  
**__**I'll do anything for you!**__**  
**__**So in love with you,**__**  
**__**So in love with you!**_

"Jane, do you know who that was?" Maura exclaimed.

"Don't worry, Maura. I knew what I was doing. The mayor is a lightweight. This wouldn't be the first time I've had to save a damsel in distress from his advances." Jane told her. She turned to the bartender and ordered a beer while Maura looked at her with a tilted head. Before she spoke, Jane cut her off. "That will be a story for another time, babe. Let's go find the boys."

She took her beer in her right hand, her other secured around the doctor's waist. As they walked, heads turned at the couple.

"Jane?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Just for future reference, I am not a damsel in distress. I handled myself quite well."

"I know you did. I was impressed. And a little turned on." Maura turned to her dark haired girlfriend and smiled coyly.

"It turns you on to see me reject people?"

"If I say yes?"

"Then, I'll have to make it a habit."

"Turning people down?"

"Yes."

"I thought you did that already. We are in a committed relationship, Dr. Isles." Maura leaned up and kissed her girlfriend in full view of the room.

"That we are, Jane. That we are."

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**Now, before you go write glorious reviews for this story, I wanted to thank everyone who has followed and reviewed this story. Your support means the world to me.**

**If you feel so inclined to, shoot me a message on tumblr angiesvoice. Say hi, send a suggestion. Whatever you want.**


	10. She Will Be Loved

Maura Isles was tired. Her feet screamed as she toed off her new pair of heels in the doorway. She regretted wearing them on this particular day. With two of her lap techs out with the flu, things were hectic in the morgue. A distant cousin of the mayor had been killed in a car accident and he requested that she do the autopsy personally, before she left for the night. The hands of her wrist watch fell over the 10. All she wanted was a salad, a glass of wine, and to curl up next to her girlfriend. She did not register the sound of music until she'd put her coat away in the hall closet.

The followed the melodious sound in the bedroom. She expected the stereo in her and Jane's bedroom to be playing, but what she found threw her off. Her dark haired detective lay in the center of the bed, a black guitar sitting in her lap. Her long fingers held on tight to the neck of the instrument as her other hand held a pick and strummed across the steel cords.

"_**Beauty queen of only eighteen. She had some trouble with herself. She was always there to help her. She always belonged to someone else**_." Maura quickly noticed the change in pronoun, but chose not to make her presence known. Jane seemed so at piece, she couldn't bear disturbing the nightmare plagued woman. Her hands moved with great ease.

This side of Jane was a mystery to Maura. She did not know that Jane knew how to play the guitar. There was hinting over the years about piano lessons as a child but her first encounter with Charles Hoyt left her cringing at the thought of her long fingers ghosting of pearly white keys.

"_**I drove for miles and miles and wound up at your door. I've had you so many times but somehow, I want more**_." The warmth of Jane's voice wrapped around Maura like a wool blanket on a cold night. She leaned against the door and melted into the sound of her lover's voice. It was also new to her that Jane could sing. With a voice like the detectives, it shouldn't be a surprise, but it still was.

"_**I don't mind spending every day, out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with the broken smile; ask her if she wants to say a while. And she will be loved. She will be loved**_." Maura was so entranced that she didn't notice Jane looking up at her, smiling as she sang. She nodded for the doctor to come closer. Maura inched closer to the bed.

"_**Tap on my window, knock on my door. I want to make you feel beautiful. I know I tend to be so insecure. It doesn't matter anymore." **_Brown eyes sang to her as her heart flutter in her chest. Well, not literally, but the metaphor seemed to be the only way she could describe how she was feeling at the moment. Jane was singing to her. Jane was singing about her. It wasn't her song, but the sentiment was not lost the medical examiner. She placed her knee on the bed and climbed across, sitting in on the heel on her feet as Jane sang.

"_**It's not always rainbows and butterflies. It's compromise that moves us along, yeah. My heart is full and my door's always open. You can come anytime you want.**_" The song was true. Life was not always rainbows and butterflies. It was hard. They both knew that from experience. The last year had been the hardest of them all. Between the warehouse incident and entering into a relationship, things were hard.

After rectifying her mistake, Maura did whatever she could to find her way back into Jane's good graces. It was not easy. The detective was not easily trusting and leaving had cost Maura every ounce of Jane's trust that she'd earned over the years. There was not a day that she did not regret her actions. She wanted to be angry but what Jane did was right. She was the only one in the wrong. Paddy Doyle was a known criminal, wanted by the FBI. Sure, he was her biological father, but all he did was contribute the sperm. He gave her up. He told her birth mother that she'd died. He kidnapped her and used her like he did everyone else. What made Maura chose him over the woman who had saved her life so many times? She couldn't figure it out, but she vowed to never betray Jane like that again.

They fell into bed quickly; the need to satisfy a sexual tension that had built up over the years greater than their need to hate each other. It was violet and rough. There was hair pulling and biting and a battle for dominance. Eventually, Jane won. After several hours of avoiding the elephant in the room, Maura finally made the decision to grovel. She thought it would take everything she had to get Jane to forgive her but the detective shocked her.

Jane had forgiven her long before she chose to arrive at the woman's doorstep with her tail between her legs. It was a relief, to say the least. Maura felt like a huge burden had been lifted from her shoulders. She wrapped her arms around the naked woman and hugged her as if it was the last chance she would get to feel her lean body against her curvy one.

"_**I don't mind spending every day, out on your corner in the pouring rain. Look for the girl with the broken smile. Ask her if she wants to stay a while. And she will be loved. And she will be loved**_" Maura climbed across and leaned against the headboard, her head falling onto Jane's shoulder. She felt the movement of Jane's hands as she strummed. "_**And she will be loved. And she will be loved. I know where you hide. Along in your care. Know all of the things that make you who you are. I know that goodbye means nothing at all. Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls.**_"

The crack in Jane's voice alerted her to the pain the other woman was feeling. She looked up and saw hot tears streaming down her lover's face. Her heart ached. She hadn't realized that she'd caused Jane so much pain. She didn't cry often and when she did, it was heartbreaking. Maura reached up and wiped a stray tear from her face.

"I'm so sorry, Jane. For every thing. I never meant to hurt you like this." She whispered into her ear. Jane did not reply to her. She continued to sing until she neared the end of the song. Her hands were sore and her body exhausted but she was determined.

"_**Please don't try so hard to say goodbye. Please don't try so hard to say goodbye. I don't mind spending everyday out on your corner in the pouring rain. Try so hard to say goodbye.**_" She lifted the guitar and rested it on the floor. She slowly turned to Maura and captured the other woman's lips in a gentle kiss. She pulled back and searched hazel eyes. "I love you."

"I love you too."


	11. Lead Me Into Love

**Hey guys.**

**I'm giving you all permission to hate me. I hate me too. My posting has been crap and it has reflected in the number of reviews. I am so sorry. My muse has been on vacation and it has been very hard for me to write. I have great ideas but the words aren't coming to me.**

**For those of you still following this story, thank you for your patience. Please enjoy the final chapter of the Jane and Maura are fighting storyline. **

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_**We may never understand**__**  
**__**If love just happens or it's planned**__**  
**__**We must believe our spirits know somehow**__**  
**__**Baby we can't stop the falling we feel now**_

Love is a complicated and powerful thing. It appears in infinite forms, different shades of grey. There is the most basic love, the bond between a mother and child. The connection developed over a period of nine months cannot be replicated. To hold a child that is not biologically your own and still wanting to protect it with your life. There is also love between friends, between family, between own and pet.

The greatest love of all is the deep and eternal connection shared between lovers. In our world, some relationships are not accepted because they are unholy and sinful. A man shall not lay with man as a woman shall not lay with woman. That is the conflict that exists today. They say that this love in an abomination. That homosexuals will burn in hells flames for their love. They claim that God loves all of his children but condemns this love. Love is love, isn't it?

Fifty years ago, this conflict existed in another form: racial equality. It was against the law for black and whites to marry. The penalty for breaking this law was death, but not by a jury. It was in the streets or in a field at night. They were sentenced to death by his fellow men. Late at night, so far away that his loved ones could not hear his cries as the leather whip pierced the skin of his back or the sound of the bullet plowing through his skull. All because he loved a white woman. With time, they learned that this injustice was inhuman and unconstitutional. There was no fairness in "separate but not equal." History is repeating itself with a twist; rather than color people wanting rights, gay couples want rights under the law. They want to be treated as any straight couple would be. Isn't it the same thing?

The state of Massachusetts thought so. Homophobic slurs and derogatory comments were not thrown at the two women walking down the street holding hands. Lips turned up at the sight of a detective and the chief medical examiner for the commonwealth of Massachusetts whispering sweet nothings in each other's ears. They were just two women in love. Who were they to judge?

_**New emotion starts to flow**__**  
**__**And now this time it wants control**__**  
**__**Baby, if our love was meant to be so strong**__**  
**__**Something close to magic's going on**_

Maura stopped in front of her Prius, prepared to open the door for her date, but instead, she found her back pressed against the cool metal, Jane's hands on her waist.

"This night isn't over, detective." She whispered as her eyes found Jane's smirking lips.

"I think you misunderstand my intentions, doctor. The night is far from over." Jane leaned in and captured the doctor's lips in a searing kiss. Her tongue demanded entrance and Maura was happy to oblige. She sighed as Jane filled her, her knees nearly buckling from under her. She grabbed onto the taller woman's shoulder's to steady herself. She pulled away and looked into the smug woman's eyes. Jane kissed her again and said, "I've missed you."

"I've missed you too. Now, get in the car." She pushed Jane off of her and turned around the open the door. She waited for her date to get in before she gently closed the door and walked around to the driver's side. She composed herself before getting into the car.

"You're bossy."

"I am not." She said defensively.

"I don't mind. I actually find it kind of hot."

"Put on your seatbelt."

Jane smiled at her, a smile reserved for only her. It was sweet and cute. Not many people saw this smile. It didn't appear very often. Death was not a business where you could find a lot of happiness. Telling a victim's family that their loved one was no longer with them? Seeing the pain and sorrow in their eyes? There was no happiness in that. Before Maura came along, there was no happiness in Jane's life. Her first encounter with Charles Hoyt left her scarred. But Maura had a super power. She could make Jane smile. She could make her smile so bright that you could see in even the darkest of rooms. Maura cherished that smile. She held on to it like it was an endangered baby panda. You had to be gentle with it for it is a fragile creature and could break at the slightest of disturbances. Maura was a skilled medical professional. She had graceful dexterity and was up to the challenge of bringing happiness to her hardened detective.

_**Take my hand and lead me into love**_

_**Light the way for me**_

_**Without your touch, I cannot see**_

_**Lead me into love**_

_**I'm deep in the miracle of you**_

As they drove through the streets of Boston, the bright city lights began to fade and they were driving on a paved path, heading out of town. The scenery was breathtaking but Jane was more focused on the woman next to her. She reached out and grasped her smaller woman's hand. Maura briefly turned to her and saw the intense stare in Jane's eye.

"What?"

"Sometimes, I need to feel you, to make sure all of this is real. To make sure that I am not in a hospital somewhere, in a coma, dreaming about you." She said solemnly.

"I can assure you, you are not dreaming." Maura told her as she pulled her car to a stop on what appeared to be the side of the road.

"Where are we, Maura?"

"Don't worry. It's all a part of my plan. You'll see." She turned off the engine and got out of the car, jogging to the other side to let her lover out. Jane followed her to the trunk of her car, taking the proffered blanket as it was handed to her by the doctor. Maura picked up a picnic basket and motioned for Jane to follow her.

They walked half a mile until they reached a shallow hill. When Maura began to walk up the hill, Jane did her best to keep up, not amused by the ease in which her girlfriend climbed the hill in six inch heels.

"How the hell are you walking up this hill?" She questioned, stopping to slipping off the shoes on her feet before running to catch up with the blonde.

"Wearing heels is a skill that I perfected a long time ago."

"I don't hear you saying that when you're begging for a massage after wearing new shoes for the first time." Maura scoffed.

"Those days are an exception."

"Okay, whatever you say, babe."

_**When we feel excitement rise**_

_**We'll share the secret found in lover's eye**_

_**You'll speak the words of love**_

_**I'll speak them too**_

_**Baby, ain't no stopping me when I'm with you**_

_**Honey, take this heart**_

When they reached the top, Maura set the basket down and took the blanket from Jane, opening it and laying it out on the floor. The detective sat ungracefully on the covered grass with an audible thud. The doctor shook her head and gracefully sat down next to her lover. She opened the picnic basket and pulled plastic containers of food. There was a container with Jane's name in it. The dark haired woman grabbed it and opened it with childish glee. The corners of her mouth rose at the sight of the simple peanut butter and fluff sandwich inside.

"Aww, Maur." She cooed. The smile on Jane's face was enough to sooth any worries that Maura had. They would be alright. It would take time to repair their relationship, but they loved each other, nothing could stop that.

As they ate, the two women stared up into the stars only visible on the outskirts of the bright city. The glowed like nothing Jane had ever seen before. She was a city girl. It was not very often that she got the chance to contemplate the existence of a world beyond their own.

"Maura, do you think there are aliens out there?" The food was packed away and Maura lay curled in Jane's arms on the blanket. The smaller woman shrugged her shoulders. She suddenly sat up and pulled a folder from the basket. She handed it to the confused detective. Jane opened it and read the document inside. "'Jane's Star?' You named a star after me?"

_**I need you , to bring me the miracle**_

_**Baby**_

_**Honey, I want you**_

_**Baby, I see**_

_**I tell that I'm no good**_

_**Till you show me that your desire is complete and I'm all yours**_

Maura could bring herself to only nod. She was so unsure about her gift choice. Would Jane like the unusual gesture? Would she throw it back in her face? When she didn't say anything else, Maura panicked. She breathing quickened and her face turned red. She couldn't find the right words. Her throat felt tight.

"Maur, are you alright?" Jane grabbed her girlfriend's shoulders and pulled her close. "Breathe, Maura. Breathe for me, baby." Once her breathing was under control, Maura hid her face in Jane's shoulder, embarrassed that she managed to ruin their perfect night by making a fool of herself. Jane pushed her away and looked into her girlfriend's eyes. "Tell me what's wrong."

"You don't like the star. I understand. I'm just upset that I managed to ruin tonight by crying. I've missed you so much, Jane. Do you know what it is like going to bed every night not knowing if the most important person in your life is safe? I can't count the number of times that I've stayed up waiting for you. I want you to be with me Jane. I need you to be with me. You are my sunshine after the rain and I don't know what I would do without you in my life." She rambled through the tears. Jane looked at her and listened intently. She was speechless. She knew her absence had hurt Maura but to hear her vocalize her feelings was eye opening. The words were not coming to her, so she did the only thing she could think of.

The dark haired woman brought her hand to the back of the doctor's neck and pulled her in for a tender kiss. There was no urgency, it was just a kiss. Her lover stilled under her but the feeling of Jane's tongue skirting across her bottom lip tore her from her thoughts. She bit down on Jane's lip, eliciting a moan from the other woman. Her hand moved to cup Jane's breast. The move stopped the detective.

"I love you, Maura. I'm sorry if I've made it seem like I feel otherwise. I love my star. This is the nerdiest gift anyone has ever given me and I love it with all my heart, just like I love you." She wrapped the smaller woman in a bear hug and held her several minutes. "Thank you, for being perfect in every way possible. Now, let's go home so I can show you just how much I love you." Maura's bottom lip jutted out in a pout.

"And here I thought making love under the stars would be romantic."

_**Baby, baby, baby**_

_**Oh, teach, teach me**_

_**The way, baby**_

_**Deep in the miracle **_

_**Come on, show me**_

_**Shine, shine your light on me**_

_**I can't see without you**_

_**I can't move without you**_

_**I can't live without you**_

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**__I know I have no right to ask, but can you review? It really helps me to know what you think of each story. **


	12. See end of chapter for song titles

**Hey guys. This story seems to be slowly winding down. I might start a sequel but if I don't, expect totally irrelevant one shots later on. Thanks for being awesome.**

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Every part of Jane's body ached. She wanted nothing more than to face plant on her and Maura's bed and sleep for days. She was thankful that her boss decided to give her the next three days off. She was running on fumes and was overdue for a break. Her bones creaked as she exited her car and shuffled up the walkway. The security light flashed above her, the dark haired woman paying ni mind to the bright beam.

She unlocked the front door and slowly pulled it open, only the thought of snuggling close to Maura keeping her from collapsing right there on the floor. Joe Friday lay asleep in her doggie bed, Bass hidden in his shell next to her in the kitchen. Rather than the usual quiet, the house was filled with loud music. She was amazed that the two animals were managing to sleep. This egregious noise would have to stop sooner as opposed to later. Jane sighed and followed the sound to the source. The door to their room was cracked open and she peered inside as she saw Maura standing at the full length mirror with a brush in her hand. She was about to open the door and greet her girlfriend, but the blonde started to sing and she believed that making her presence known would be an injustice.

"_**Oh oh, sometimes I get a good feeling, yeah. I get a feeling that I never, never, never, never had before, no no. And I just gotta tell you right now that I, I believe, I really do believe that something's got a hold on me, yeah. Oohoh, something's got a hold on me right now, child**_." The sound of Maura singing was new to Jane. While the woman had a beautiful speaking voice, her singing voice left much to be desired. Even her bedroom voice was enough to leave Jane on her knees. But, singing? She was off pitched and missed notes but that didn't matter to Jane. The whole thing was oddly endearing and hilarious. The one thing Maua Isles wasn't good at had to be singing. It was an odd act of fate. She continued to watch from her place as she danced around the room, singing at the top of her lungs in nothing but a bra and panties, her voluptuous breasts bouncing as she jumped up and down.

"_**Let me tell you now. I got a feeling, I feel so strange. Everything about me seems to have changed. Step by step, I got a brand new walk. I even sound sweeter when I talk. I said, oh, oh, oh, oh  
I said baby. Oh, it must be love**_." Jane smiled as Maura incorporated a few moves learned in her years of ballet, spinning on one foot and gracefully lifting her leg into the air.

Feeling it was time to interject, Jane pushed the door open and left out an on key and loud, "_**Let me tell you know. My heart feels heavy, my feet feel light. I shake all over, but I feel alright. I never felt like this before. Something's got a hold on me that won't let go. I never thought it could happen to me. Got me heavy without the misery. I never thought it could be this way. Love's sure gonna put a hurting on me.**_"

Maura jumped nearly 5 feet in the air as she heard Jane's voice from the doorway. A deep blush formed on her neck and cheeks as she realized that her girlfriend had probably heard and seen most of her performance. Maura Isles was not a good singer. She knew it, most her boarding school knew it, and now Jane knew it. She was a certified genius but couldn't hold a note to save her life. On top of that, fate had granted her with a girlfriend who had the voice of an angel. She stood stoic as Jane shimmied over to her and grabbed her hand, spinning her and pulling her close as a new, slower song began.

"_**Lucky me, lucky you we're a lucky pair, whenever we're together. Lady Luck cast her spell magic fills the air, whenever we're together. Fortune smiled the day we met twining our live with golden threads**_." Jane held Maura close as the new song vibrated through the house, her hands placed on her girlfriend's curved hips. She leaned in and inhaled a scent that was uniquely Maura. The shorter woman laid her head on Jane's shoulder as she continued to sing, her voice deep and husky. "_**Our love has no reality; we float on clouds and fantasy. We're free in a world where there is no peace. We found a new belief. Put your heart in your hands and you'll find love comes easy**_. _**If it seems love has passed you by, here something you should try. Put your heart in your hands and you'll find. Love comes easy**_."

"_**Lucky me, lucky you, we are shinning bright, whenever we're together**_."Maura sang softly, her voice cracking at various points. The shaking of Jane's shoulder as she laughed made Maura's heart drop. She pulled away from her lover and walked away, her hands folded across her chest.

"Maura, what's wrong?"

"I'm glad that you find me so amusing, Jane. As we all know, I am here for your entertainment." She snapped suddenly.

"You know that is not true, Maura. I would never laugh at you like that. I am offended that you are implying that. I wasn't laughing at you singing in a mean away." Maura turned and looked at Jane.

"You weren't?"

"Now, sweetie, I find your total lack of singing ability unbelievable endearing and cute."

"You think I'm cute?" Maura said, grinning playfully.

"You're as cute as a button, Maura Isles." Jane said, reaching and pulling Maura against her body again. The doctor tilted her head to the side as she considered the phrase. Jane heard the wheels turning and told her, "Don't ruin the moment."

"Okay,"

"Now, where were we?" Jane asked, finding her place in the music. "_**Our love has no reality. We float on clouds of fantasy. We're free in a world where there is no peace. We found a new belief. Put your heart in your hands and you'll find love comes easy. If it seems love has passed you by here something you should try. Put your heart in your hands and you'll find, love comes easy**_."

"I love you, Jane."

"I love you too, Maur."

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**The songs titles for this chapter are Somethings Got A Hold On Me by Christina Aguilera and Love Comes Easy by Maysa Leak. Both titles were to long for the chapter title box, so I'm leaving them here.  
**

**Don't forget to shoot me a review to show you love. If you don't, Rizzles will not become canon.**


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